St. Patrick’s Day is when everyone is suddenly Irish. It’s the holiday everyone celebrates like they’re in college again, and it’s socially acceptable! No matter where you are, you are sure to run into some of these people when you’re out celebrating!
There’s always that one person who is obsessed with whether you’re wearing green or not and will most definitely pinch you if you aren’t. When did assaulting someone for not wearing green become okay? If you’re one of these people, it’s time to reevaluate your celebration strategy.
The Over Achievers
These are the most obnoxious. They can’t limit their celebration to merely wearing a green shirt. They’re decked out from head-to-toe in green, even going as far as to wear green wigs and tutus. They’ll encourage you to “get into the spirit,” but at the end of the night you can generally find them passed out in the middle of the bar with their glass still full of green beer.
Sometimes the pros can be mistaken for over achievers. While they embrace the spirit of the holiday and wear green, they don’t go overboard. And they have tricks up their sleeves to make sure they’re not the ones passing out mid green ale.
These non-participants refuse to wear green and are the epitome of the Grinch for St. Patrick’s Day. However, friends seem to force these people to come to the bars with them in the hopes that they’ll enjoy themselves and learn to love the holiday too.
Actual Irish People
If you’re hitting up the local Irish pub, you’re likely to run into someone who is actually Irish and would have likely been at the bar anyway. While some Irish folk get offended by the rest of us taking over their holiday, others don’t mind at all. Especially because they know that if they tell someone they’re Irish, it’s probable they’ll get a free drink out of it—but they probably prefer beer that isn’t green.
Keep in mind, if you can’t spot them, you just might be one! And remember that leprechauns can’t be trusted.